last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
Randomize
