No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
May the power of my ass compel you!!
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
