I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
