Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
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