Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize