I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
