I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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