Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
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