he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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