Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
