If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
