his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
