Do you still have your period?
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
I was to drunk to walk in jimmy john's so I called and got a pickle delivered to me outside the bar , too much?
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
