Joe is yelling at the trees again.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
