I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
