Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
