So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
false alarm. still invincible.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
birth control should be required to get into college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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