do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
