Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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