I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
