new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Randomize
