so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
