The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
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