so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
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I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
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