Slut skills are useful in every country.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
