Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
