you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
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