what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
