One girl and one boy is just not enough.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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