Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
