A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
