walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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