We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
