I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
