she takes plan B like it's going out of style
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night