I just made out with a guy for $7.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Randomize
