And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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