O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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