Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
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