Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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