I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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