Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
