He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Damn victory sex feels great
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
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