Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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