direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize