I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Randomize
