Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
