I feel like abortions should bother me more
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
