"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I fill condoms, not promises.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
we should paint friendship bongs
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