her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
Randomize
